Narrative

As far as conversation topics go, suicide is not one of casual brunches nor awkward encounters with strangers in an elevator, and it should not be. Conversations surrounding suicide, especially of one’s risk, are serious and vital because conversations of suicide can ultimately save lives.

It may arise from passing conversation about my field with a distant relative, or a brief interaction about work with a longtime friend, and the mentioning one specific three syllable word completely interrupts any previous conversational flow:

su·i·cide

[ˈso͞oəˌsīd]

noun, the action of intentionally ending one’s own life.

The word seems to equate to nails on a chalk board for most, stimulating a slight wince of avoidance and hesitancy. Culturally, there is an unwritten standard that we do not talk about suicide for more time than need be, giving the topic its due and hurriedly moving on. This is by no means entirely negative, as there is a certain level of respect for the topics gravity. However, this regard toward talking of suicide quickly advances into outright evasion and shunning if not deliberately talked about with intention.

Amid any firearm safety training or instruction, a tenet that is continually stressed is treating a firearm as if it is loaded at all times. This idea assumes a stance of caution, proactively taking measures which minimize risk and increase safety. The honesty and directness within this approach is comparable to the stance needed in a explorative conversation of ones suicidal ideation and safety. Assuming an individual who displays severe distress and instability as no risk to themselves is to toy with a firearm that may be loaded.

Literature

Contrary to the general belief that talking about suicide directly increases suicidality, it has been widely accepted within psychological literature on the topic that talking about suicide has no correlation to increased suicidality. This means that talking about suicide does not increase the likelihood of suicide. 

This points to much of the unease individuals have when approaching the topic of suicide, especially in the event of consoling an individual who is struggling with suicidal ideation. It is important to remember that directly asking “are you thinking about suicide?” is not only safe but necessary so next steps can be taken and help can be found.

Culmination

It is important that we hold the topic of suicide with the gravity it deserves, but by the same token address suicide when need be. It may feel awkward and nerve-racking to enter a conversation with someone who may be experiencing suicidal ideation, but your presence alone is lifesaving in those moments. To hold someone where they are and help them get the support they deserve is to bring light into their darkness, to bring hope into their bottomless despair.

If you or someone you know is feeling suicidal, call or text 988. The National Suicide Hotline is staffed around the clock with certified members of the American Association of Suicidology. Or the Crisis Text Line, text CO to 741741 from anywhere in the United States, anytime. A live, trained Crisis Counselor receives the text and responds, all from a secure online platform.